Clarinet Hoedown

It has been these past two weeks that I have rediscovered my love of la musica.
Well, duh, it's always been there, but having not been able to play my beloved music making friend for

                                                  let's just say it's been harder than I thought.

I'm just gonna lay out the facts here. I'm not that big of a practicer. Mostly I only accomplish that in Independent Music Study during 6th period, IF that (don't worry though. This will change when I begin taking lessons!). But now when I am surrounded by all this beautiful music like Phantom of the Opera, Folk Song Suite, Sleepers Wake, Liebestod, and Suite of Old American Dances, Canterbury Chorale, Incantation and Dance, Rocky Point Holiday, Russian Christmas, Gum Suckers March, Greensleeves, it's such a struggle not to pick up my clarinet and play away. When everyone else is reading a piece that sounds like so much fun, my fingers start waggling away trying to figure out the fingerings. However it's still not the same as producing a sound and feeling the music.

It's just great to know that music is a universal language. If I went to an Arabic speaking country and found a 16 year old girl who played the clarinet at the same level I do, despite her race and culture and language and religion and everything else in the world that defines us, her C would still be my C. She would still have struggles with scales like I do. She would still have a hard time figuring out how to play a Bb in tune and how one would ever play a C#, C, and Eb, respectively, in sequence and successfully with no blips. She would be yearning for a nicer clarinet but would know that one would never come. She would be searching for the best reed out there. She would be craving the latest challenge that her fingers can take on and conquer. We could play a duet and it would sound good.

that is why clarinet is number one.

                                                I'm sorry Coco Chanel, I took you for granted.


The beginning of the end

Upon stumbling on my own blog (yeah, it happens) I was gonna write an epic post of epic proportions telling the world of my decision to stay with Timpview Ballroom Company.

wow I just let the cat out of the bag
post over I guess.....


You can't get rid of me that easily.

I did indeed choose to stay with my beloved company. I couldn't bare to leave them. And I'll be spending more time with these wittle people:

minus Vanessa..... :(


these chiquitas

and seriously. how could you resist this:

but i will miss this girl

and also this one

and of course this one

and yes maybe even this guy a little.....

So goodbye to Timpview Ballroom 2010-2011
Hello to a new team
and new coaches
But we'll bring it.
We always do
Even with our besties on new teams
We'll always be BFF's.
The proof is in the picture, right Lauren?


Are you jealous yet?

The whole point of this post is to make you jealous.

As I was sitting around this whole weekend because no one cared to come visit me (ha just kiding. But seriously though. Only Bao, Jared, Christian, Jonathan, Rachel, Tate, and Yon Soo visited me. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, just jealous.).......okay I just lost my train of thought.
The point of this story was that Steph texted me and said we hadn't hung out in a long time, which was true, so she picked me up and we "hung" :)
We went to Jamba because I haven't had enough of those this weekend. And then we proceeded to think of something to do. We wanted to play Bang! with people but apparently everyone and their dog decided to go to a play that night. So we were left alone as outcasts like Steph and I are always are.

And then, a brilliant idea hit me, let's do crafts. Without everybody else going to their silly plays.
let's make em jealous.
So off to Michaels we sped in search of time consuming activities. As Steph put it:
we were desperate

We found lots of things we could possibly want to do, but we had limited time and couldn't do it all in one night. So we concocted a plan. All these craft ideas that we have always wanted to do but never did will now be done by yours truly. We made a list and decided we WILL do these crafts throughout the summer.

And all these crafts will be done to make you, yes, YOU, jealous. You might be able to join us, we haven't decided that yet. But let me tell you, you will be jealous. It's okay though. That's normal.

And because I refused to let her take pictures of me that night on account of the fact that I looked like a fat chipmunk, here is an older picture of us. Regardless, we are still cool :)

are you jealous yet?

I'm holding on. And I am brave as it get's easier to breathe

This whole "coming of age" stuff is overrated.
Turning 16 comes with a whole lot more stuff than I ever bargained for.

First of all: driving.
I'm flat broke and I can't even afford gas. So I go until I finally get my little paycheck and my car literally almost dies in the intersection (shhh don't tell my dad) while I'm saying a frantic prayer asking Heavenly Father to please let me make it at least make it into the parking lot of Will's. It's a never ending cycle.

Second: boys.
I wish it was legal to throw rocks at them. I'm so mature that I literally cannot wait until my wedding day and I don't have to think about awkwardness or dates or relationships that won't last or anything of the stupid sorts.

Last: wisdom
On Thursday I got my wisdom taken away from me. It wasn't enjoyable. I look like a chipmunk and no one believes that I am NOT on drugs. I knew that day would come but let's just say I am in fact glad that it is all over. I just can't play my beloved clarinet for 2 weeks and I do not know how I am going to last.

I wish I was an adult so I could have an excuse to stay out all night and do nothing. That would be fun, wouldn't it?


I guess the change in my pocket wasn't enough.

I have cried waaaaay too much in these past two days.

For one: State Band. Woot!
It was so fun. And exhilarating. Playing that music was just like.....AH! Definitely one of the best state sets ever. I was so emotionally attached to and invested in the music.
But the inevitable senior line.
Even "grown" high school "men" can't escape the tears and sniffles. I know I didn't. And in one mere month or so, Bao and I take charge. ACK!

And then we come to today.
The spring ballroom concert. For me personally, it was a culmination of 3 years, 2 sets of coaches, 3 different teams, brand new medleys, brand new dresses, drama, undrama, laughs, Burger Supreme, giraffes, Matrix, Brasilia, twins, California, betrayal, repentance, hard work, hairspray, JV, Nationals, competitions, role models, friends, makeup, dance parties, injuries, tears, tie dye shirts, varsity, choreography, after school practices, early morning rehearsals, floor times, inside jokes, Sheela, Roxanne, prelims, division I, yard sales, fundraisers, tickets, and stretching. But mostly love and unity.

Which is why we have succeeded. Which is why I am now sad.
I don't want this 3 years to come to an end. And it quite possibly might.
I'll be brutally honest here. I don't want anybody to try out for BYU. But it's already too late.
However, I do respect everyone's decision. I don't like it, but I respect it.
I just wish everyone could understand how GOOD we can be. Because we already are gosh dang it!!!!
I honestly can't bare to think of what next year might bring; I may or may not be dancing. And I may or may not be dancing against some of my best friends in the world.

sad face :(


that's why I cried tonight.
good bye seniors.
good bye Timpview Ballroom